Magic: the Gathering News for December 2002
Good Man of the Week: Brian Kibler, the Awakener
From the King to the Dragon King, this week we recognize Brian Kibler. Brian and I first met at Grand Prix Boston. This tournament was tempest block constructed in which he was part of a conspiracy to keep the best deck ever constructed from me. This was the first of two times the Speds kicked me right in the cock. They had Counter-Phoenix before anyone else (except CMU) and they didn’t share.
Jarrod Bright Copyrights Elves, Birds, Mana Acceleration
PERTH, AUSTRALIA -- In a move that astounded trademark lawyers across the globe, Brainburst writer Jarrod Bright announced that he now owns the copyright any deck containing the words "4x Birds of Paradise, 4x Llanowar Elves." Players running decks containing these creatures must pay Bright a set fee, which will be ranked on a scale according to lifetime total winnings.
Good Man of the Week: The King
Jason Opalka has had a storied past in the game of Magic: the Gathering. Back in 1996 he was named T2K, short for Type Two King. Jason wore this mantle proudly and carries a hint of the name even today. Most often referred to as “King” Jason has had many nicknames including “Opie”, “Oomap Loompa”, “Cartman”, “The Human Sphere”, “That Really Fat Short Kid”, “Giant Bag”, you name it.
Copping Out, Prelude: The Prep Work
I promised last week that I would write a story this week. I don't actually have the story done yet, but I'd like to tell you the work that went into writing the story.
Call to Arms #1: Strategy Column Writers
Lately there’s been a seemingly unstoppable flow of stupidity spilling forth and washing away any foundation of cohesive thought. I’m going to try and staunch that flow. For now, I focus on a vermin that infests everything intelligent about our addictive game.
Bleiweiss To Write Great American Novel
Ben Bleiweiss, famed author of the critically acclaimed short story, I'll Bet a Hundred Words Per Card That These'll All See Play In The New Extended, has decided to expand the story into the Great American Novel, tentatively titled "18,000 Words".
I Win E-League Tournament Without Attending
Last Saturday, to my surprise, I won an E-League Master tournament. It was an Extended event, and I am not particularly fond of the format. This is primarily because MTGO, my environment of choice, lacks Sixth Edition and the expansions Tempest through Prophecy. Because of this, and because the majority of E-League's patrons have the combined intelligence of my sock (the left one), I opted to skip the tournament. Luckily this did not keep me from winning the whole shebang.
Good Man of the Week: Matt Linde
We have here one of the best men to ever grace the pages of MiseTings. Matt Linde and I first met sitting next to each other at a poker table at Origins. He had just finished unsuccessfully defending his title and wanted a little action. He didn’t know much about the game (Which of course we were just playing for fun. We would never think of running a live poker game at a Magic Tournament). I helped him out a little and we both ended up about $250 (Fake money of course. We would never think of running a live poker game at a Magic Tournament).
Akroma Barely 18, Waiting To Talk To You
Dominaria -- Akroma, the angelic, shapely, blue-haired Magic: The Gathering character from the card Pacifism, announced on Thursday that she is barely 18 and that she is waiting to talk to Magic players all over the world.
Longest Winning Streak In Magic Broken As Oscar Tan Loses Game
Flags waved at half-mast yesterday at the unprecedented news that Oscar Tan had lost a match to a TnT deck at some undetermined point last week. Despite the fact that Tan had churned out an amazing seventy articles in his popular series "You CAN Play Type One (But You Can't Fucking Afford It)," up until now he had managed to win every game he had written about.
Morph Guy Not Checked, Really a Land
SACRAMENTO, CA -- In round 2 of the PT Chicago Qualifier held November 9, competitor Virres Moucu dealt the final 2 points of damage in the third and deciding game with Allen Sun with a 2/2 Morph Guy that was really a basic land.
Good Man of the Week: Alex Shvartsman
Guest Columnist: Ed Fear. Ladies and gentlemen, I would not lightly displace my good friend KK, nor needlessly put myself in a position which seems prone to great criticism, but this past weekend in Los Angeles I was on the receiving side of an act of benevolence and good will that requires repeating.