Seattle, WA — All the hype has died down. The word is out, “IT” is going to revolutionize our lives, right? What about for us gamers who don’t go places or walk around or do any other kind of physical activity? How will “IT” help me while we’re sitting in my basement around a poorly lit table staring at little pieces of cardboard with no women in a 3 mile radius? Well worry no more my friends.

Wizards of the Coast will be releasing the “This” designed specifically with gamers in mind. “This” is a 2 person mobile unit with a table at its center. “This” will allow gamers to move around, whether it be to the movies or their local gaming store, and not have to stop playing magic.

The main features of “This” that will attract any gamer is an automatic deck shuffler and card drawer, which will allow the minimum use of energy needed to keep your muscles alive. “This” is equipped with an estrogen sensor, which will detect a female up to 30 yards away. “This” will then move at a rate of 45 MPH in the opposite direction so as not to put any unwanted stress of the gamers. Up to 2 extra chairs may be attached to “This” allowing multiplayer games. None of the commands on “This” are voice activated, so the gamer is in no way forced to socialize with any people or machines.

“This” will be available in the new year and will retail for a price of $2500. As a special offer, if “This” is purchased before the new year you will receive 1 virtual draft set FREE for use with Magic:Online.

Discuss this article in the Magic: the Gathering Forums!

Seattle, WA — All the hype has died down. The word is out, “IT” is going to revolutionize our lives, right? What about for us gamers who don’t go places or walk around or do any other kind of physical activity? How will “IT” help me while we’re sitting in my basement around a poorly lit table staring at little pieces of cardboard with no women in a 3 mile radius? Well worry no more my friends.

Wizards of the Coast will be releasing the “This” designed specifically with gamers in mind. “This” is a 2 person mobile unit with a table at its center. “This” will allow gamers to move around, whether it be to the movies or their local gaming store, and not have to stop playing magic.

The main features of “This” that will attract any gamer is an automatic deck shuffler and card drawer, which will allow the minimum use of energy needed to keep your muscles alive. “This” is equipped with an estrogen sensor, which will detect a female up to 30 yards away. “This” will then move at a rate of 45 MPH in the opposite direction so as not to put any unwanted stress of the gamers. Up to 2 extra chairs may be attached to “This” allowing multiplayer games. None of the commands on “This” are voice activated, so the gamer is in no way forced to socialize with any people or machines.

“This” will be available in the new year and will retail for a price of $2500. As a special offer, if “This” is purchased before the new year you will receive 1 virtual draft set FREE for use with Magic:Online.

Discuss this article in the Magic: the Gathering Forums!