When he found out he could ban people from events that had not even taken place yet, as when he banned Kurtis Hahn from GP Tampa before it even started, Tournament Organizer John Shannon banned 4 people from Florida’s next Grand Prix this past Monday.

It all first started in the morning when Shannon hailed a cab to get him to the grocery store. When he tried to pay the man in his recently acquired draft sets and judge foils, the cabbie told him to “screw off.”

"I immediately charged the cab and let him know he was not to be allowed to play in the next GP. My over-inflated ego demands RESPECT!!! I was giving him a deal, too! I was only valuing Torment packs at $2 and even throwing in a foil Gaea’s Blessing!”

Then, while in the grocery store a woman took the last box of Corn Pops as Shannon was reaching for it. He told her right away of her banned status.

“I have no clue what this “GP” thing is, but I do know that guy must have many brain lesions. I kind of feel sorry for the guy,” said the confused woman.

Having to settle for Fruit Loops, a demoralized Shannon went to go hang out at a local card store. Seeing a teenage delinquent rip off 2 Call of the Herd for a Lord of the Pit from a young child sent Shannon into frenzy.

“Not only are you banned from the next Florida GP, you are also banned from the DCI. I can do that, you know. I’m the all powerful Tournament Organizer!”

The scruffy looking teen reported when asked about his recent banning, “I don’t know what this crazy ‘GP’ thing is or ABC, NBC, or AFI organization is, but this guy is crazy. He did have a referee shirt on, so I guess he has some sort of authority."

The last banning of the night came when Shannon received an email from a girl he was checking out on AmericanSingles.com. She denied his request for a date and he sent back an email telling her that he "better not see her" in any PTQs in the Florida area.

“I’m not doing this to make me feel like a big man or anything,” explained Shannon after devouring his microwaved TV dinner. “When I banned Kurt from the GP it’s not like I was abusing my power because he insulted me and made me look bad. We have to get these bad influences out of our games.”

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When he found out he could ban people from events that had not even taken place yet, as when he banned Kurtis Hahn from GP Tampa before it even started, Tournament Organizer John Shannon banned 4 people from Florida’s next Grand Prix this past Monday.

It all first started in the morning when Shannon hailed a cab to get him to the grocery store. When he tried to pay the man in his recently acquired draft sets and judge foils, the cabbie told him to “screw off.”

"I immediately charged the cab and let him know he was not to be allowed to play in the next GP. My over-inflated ego demands RESPECT!!! I was giving him a deal, too! I was only valuing Torment packs at $2 and even throwing in a foil Gaea’s Blessing!”

Then, while in the grocery store a woman took the last box of Corn Pops as Shannon was reaching for it. He told her right away of her banned status.

“I have no clue what this “GP” thing is, but I do know that guy must have many brain lesions. I kind of feel sorry for the guy,” said the confused woman.

Having to settle for Fruit Loops, a demoralized Shannon went to go hang out at a local card store. Seeing a teenage delinquent rip off 2 Call of the Herd for a Lord of the Pit from a young child sent Shannon into frenzy.

“Not only are you banned from the next Florida GP, you are also banned from the DCI. I can do that, you know. I’m the all powerful Tournament Organizer!”

The scruffy looking teen reported when asked about his recent banning, “I don’t know what this crazy ‘GP’ thing is or ABC, NBC, or AFI organization is, but this guy is crazy. He did have a referee shirt on, so I guess he has some sort of authority."

The last banning of the night came when Shannon received an email from a girl he was checking out on AmericanSingles.com. She denied his request for a date and he sent back an email telling her that he "better not see her" in any PTQs in the Florida area.

“I’m not doing this to make me feel like a big man or anything,” explained Shannon after devouring his microwaved TV dinner. “When I banned Kurt from the GP it’s not like I was abusing my power because he insulted me and made me look bad. We have to get these bad influences out of our games.”

Discuss this article in the Magic: the Gathering Forums!