Malka To Drop 'Nice Guy Act'

By: dbuel - May 23, 2002

The Magic community recoiled with a mixture of shock, amazement and head-scratching as veteran Magic player Sol Malka announced he would drop what he called his "nice guy act" in favor of his natural manner of speaking.

"Hear this, beeatches. That motherfucker Chris Benafel an' his little bitch PTR fixin' to get their asses pimp slapped into the atmosphere," Malka said at a news conference. "I ain't playin'."

"Motherfuckers disrespected me. Disrespect me: That's your ass," he added. "That's my new, like, credo an' shit."

One reporter reminded Malka that he has, until now, been known as "The People's Champion."

"The people ain't done me shit," Malka said. "What they ever do for me? Nothin'."

Malka also said that he would be changing the name of the deck he is known for playing, "The Rock and his Millions."

"Fuck The Rock," Malka said. "He sucks. I only named the shit after his stupid white ass to fool all y'all dumb motherfuckers. From now on, I be callin' that shit Men on a Motherfuckin' Mission."

Some speculated that Malka's reversion to his natural mannerisms would garner him an entirely new field of fans.

"Like I give a fuck," Malka said.

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MiseTings is a Magic: the Gathering humor site. MiseTings.Com is not intended for readers under 18 years of age. MiseTings content does not represent the views or opinions of the editor. All original content herein is copyright © 2001-2006, World Wide Webware, all rights reserved. No portion of this web site may be used in any way without expressed written consent. Magic: The Gathering® is a registered trademark owned by Wizards of the Coast, Inc., a subsidiary of Hasbro, Inc. MiseTings is not produced or endorsed by Wizards of the Coast, Inc. We respect your privacy, interested parties should check our Privacy Policy. Play hard and mise often.

Malka To Drop 'Nice Guy Act' - MiseTings

Malka To Drop 'Nice Guy Act'

By: dbuel - May 23, 2002

The Magic community recoiled with a mixture of shock, amazement and head-scratching as veteran Magic player Sol Malka announced he would drop what he called his "nice guy act" in favor of his natural manner of speaking.

"Hear this, beeatches. That motherfucker Chris Benafel an' his little bitch PTR fixin' to get their asses pimp slapped into the atmosphere," Malka said at a news conference. "I ain't playin'."

"Motherfuckers disrespected me. Disrespect me: That's your ass," he added. "That's my new, like, credo an' shit."

One reporter reminded Malka that he has, until now, been known as "The People's Champion."

"The people ain't done me shit," Malka said. "What they ever do for me? Nothin'."

Malka also said that he would be changing the name of the deck he is known for playing, "The Rock and his Millions."

"Fuck The Rock," Malka said. "He sucks. I only named the shit after his stupid white ass to fool all y'all dumb motherfuckers. From now on, I be callin' that shit Men on a Motherfuckin' Mission."

Some speculated that Malka's reversion to his natural mannerisms would garner him an entirely new field of fans.

"Like I give a fuck," Malka said.

Discuss this article in the Magic: the Gathering Forums!

MiseTings is a Magic: the Gathering humor site. MiseTings.Com is not intended for readers under 18 years of age. MiseTings content does not represent the views or opinions of the editor. All original content herein is copyright © 2001-2006, World Wide Webware, all rights reserved. No portion of this web site may be used in any way without expressed written consent. Magic: The Gathering® is a registered trademark owned by Wizards of the Coast, Inc., a subsidiary of Hasbro, Inc. MiseTings is not produced or endorsed by Wizards of the Coast, Inc. We respect your privacy, interested parties should check our Privacy Policy. Play hard and mise often.