SEATTLE, WA – Longtime Magic player and former Minnesota State Champion Noah Weil is still going on about how he was the first person to discover Psychatog, it was learned Wednesday. Weil, who won last year’s Minnesota State Championships with a primitive version of ‘Tog, began going off again about his discovery after reading Mike Flores’ article “Your States Gauntlet” on Sideboard.com, in which Flores noted the lack of Psychatog decks at last year’s State events.

“You see, Flores said that ‘The eventually dominant archetype of the last 12 months - Psychatog - made very little noise at last year's string of events,’” said Weil, who once played in some Pro Tours a while back. “But that’s not true, because [Weil’s team] Monster Rod had the Psychatog tech all the way back then. We were the first.”

Weil’s claim to the deck stems from his victory in last year’s Minnesota championships, where he piloted his Psychatog and Rotting Giant tech to victory, earning him free events for a year and temporarily postponing his inevitable fade from the public eye. Weil’s victory was all the more impressive because he managed to prevail despite losing his final round when the 8 people ahead of him in the standings all intentionally drew into the Top 8. Nevertheless, Weil then blazed through the elimination rounds, taking down Poh Kok Low’s Flowstone Charger.dec 1 game out of 2 in the finals to claim the championship.

“You can even read all about it on Brainburst,” added the previously noteworthy Weil, despite not being asked. “There was an article all about it. ‘MN State Championships: Low vs. Wei.’ That’s me, Wei. It was a typo, you see. But it was me. I had the tech. Just ask Anthony Alongi.”

According to friend Mike Smetana, who along with Weil moved away somewhere forgettable in early fall, Weil has been going on about ‘Tog nonstop since the Flores article appeared. “I came home yesterday and there he was, still messaging people on MOL about States tech. Except he never talks about 2002 states tech. He just goes off about Psychatog this, Masters Series that, it’s really sad.”

When asked for comment about the extent to which credit should be given to the deck’s original designer, Psychatog Masters Series champion Ryan Fuller had the following to say: “Noah who? Oh wait, yeah, I think I’ve heard of him. Isn’t he that guy who had the birthday at GP:Tampa last year?”

Noted Pro Dave Humpherys, who also earned a large sum of money at the Masters Series using a Psychatog design, joined in praising Weil’s innovative discovery of the powerful deck. “Wtf who is Noah Weil? Oh, the Psychatog guy. So he’s the one who’s been leaving me all those messages on MOL asking if he can join my clan. I was going to tell him at Boston to leave me the hell alone, but [Humpherys’ team Your Move Games] scrubbed out too fast.”

When contacted by MiseTings reporters, Weil commented, “WTF cavedan why the fuck are you making up all this shit about me? What did I do to deserve this?” In response, cavedan issued the following statement: “It is true that Noah Weil said none of these things and is in fact a very good Magic player, who was well-liked both in Minnesota and on the Pro Tour before he disappeared from both. Given that MiseTings has sucked shit lately, I deemed it proper that Noah should be honored with this tribute article, since no one is going to remember him at all in a few months. Let me add, though, that although writing this article has provided me with momentary amusement, the MiseTings community should not expect any more articles from me, as all you dumb shits are not worth my time =[“

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SEATTLE, WA – Longtime Magic player and former Minnesota State Champion Noah Weil is still going on about how he was the first person to discover Psychatog, it was learned Wednesday. Weil, who won last year’s Minnesota State Championships with a primitive version of ‘Tog, began going off again about his discovery after reading Mike Flores’ article “Your States Gauntlet” on Sideboard.com, in which Flores noted the lack of Psychatog decks at last year’s State events.

“You see, Flores said that ‘The eventually dominant archetype of the last 12 months - Psychatog - made very little noise at last year's string of events,’” said Weil, who once played in some Pro Tours a while back. “But that’s not true, because [Weil’s team] Monster Rod had the Psychatog tech all the way back then. We were the first.”

Weil’s claim to the deck stems from his victory in last year’s Minnesota championships, where he piloted his Psychatog and Rotting Giant tech to victory, earning him free events for a year and temporarily postponing his inevitable fade from the public eye. Weil’s victory was all the more impressive because he managed to prevail despite losing his final round when the 8 people ahead of him in the standings all intentionally drew into the Top 8. Nevertheless, Weil then blazed through the elimination rounds, taking down Poh Kok Low’s Flowstone Charger.dec 1 game out of 2 in the finals to claim the championship.

“You can even read all about it on Brainburst,” added the previously noteworthy Weil, despite not being asked. “There was an article all about it. ‘MN State Championships: Low vs. Wei.’ That’s me, Wei. It was a typo, you see. But it was me. I had the tech. Just ask Anthony Alongi.”

According to friend Mike Smetana, who along with Weil moved away somewhere forgettable in early fall, Weil has been going on about ‘Tog nonstop since the Flores article appeared. “I came home yesterday and there he was, still messaging people on MOL about States tech. Except he never talks about 2002 states tech. He just goes off about Psychatog this, Masters Series that, it’s really sad.”

When asked for comment about the extent to which credit should be given to the deck’s original designer, Psychatog Masters Series champion Ryan Fuller had the following to say: “Noah who? Oh wait, yeah, I think I’ve heard of him. Isn’t he that guy who had the birthday at GP:Tampa last year?”

Noted Pro Dave Humpherys, who also earned a large sum of money at the Masters Series using a Psychatog design, joined in praising Weil’s innovative discovery of the powerful deck. “Wtf who is Noah Weil? Oh, the Psychatog guy. So he’s the one who’s been leaving me all those messages on MOL asking if he can join my clan. I was going to tell him at Boston to leave me the hell alone, but [Humpherys’ team Your Move Games] scrubbed out too fast.”

When contacted by MiseTings reporters, Weil commented, “WTF cavedan why the fuck are you making up all this shit about me? What did I do to deserve this?” In response, cavedan issued the following statement: “It is true that Noah Weil said none of these things and is in fact a very good Magic player, who was well-liked both in Minnesota and on the Pro Tour before he disappeared from both. Given that MiseTings has sucked shit lately, I deemed it proper that Noah should be honored with this tribute article, since no one is going to remember him at all in a few months. Let me add, though, that although writing this article has provided me with momentary amusement, the MiseTings community should not expect any more articles from me, as all you dumb shits are not worth my time =[“

Discuss this article in the Magic: the Gathering Forums!